Pete Ashdown Hits It on the Head

After being spurned by the Tribune's endorsement of Hatch and their subsequent explanation that they don't like their choice, Pete Ashdown had a few choice words for them. Well met.

And now… the Top Ten Reasons Why the Tribune Endorsed Hatch.

Number 10: They lost a bet with the editors of the Deseret Morning News that Rocky would run for a third term. Number 9: They're mad that they can't get XMission to make their Internet service faster. Number 8: They got sick and tired of being called a liberal newspaper and decided to get the last laugh. Number 7: With all of the other Hatches that are running this year, they got confused as to which one was which. Number 6: A promise to not send free copies of Orrin's latest Christmas album to all of the editors. Number 5: They published their April Fool's story WAY past deadline. Number 4: The "vast right-wing conspiracy" used their orbital mind control lasers just in the knick of time. Number 3: Karl Rove. 'Nuff said. Number 2: With an effective legislator at the helm they'd be all out of topics for the "Stuff We Hate" column.

And the number one reason why the Tribune Endorsed Hatch… much like George Lucas, they've gone totally bat-crap crazy.

Thanks everyone! Remember to tip your waitresses! Try the veal! 

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1 Response

  1. That One Guy says:

    “I’ll be here all week!!”

    Still stunned at this terribly short-sighted endorsement. Astonished.

    11. Hatch is really a Jedi, and used the “hand-wave mind trick.”

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