Today, I am an old man.

After months of putting it off (and numerous threats by my mother to send in the flying monkeys), I finally went to the doctor for a general check-up. The good news is that I don't have any obvious maladies and my bloodwork turned out okay (save my HDL being a bit low). The bad news? I have high blood pressure. I'm talking 157/98 high. Now I have a blood pressure monitor thingie that I have to use several times a day and turn the results in to the doc when I go back for a visit. It kind of reminds me of high school science fair projects, except I measured lettuce and drug-resistant bacteria instead of myself.

Blood pressure isn't the sort of thing you should have to worry about at 26. It shouldn't even be high until you have a couple of kids (and as much work as they can be, dogs don't count). Next thing you know, I'll be drinking Ensure to wash down my Fibercon tablets and falling asleep watching Wheel of Fortune, my bifocals hanging in front of me on one of those silly chains. I guess the next logical step is to start driving a Buick Park Avenue way under the speed limit.

Being fat doesn't really help matters either. Shauna and I are both pretty sick of being overweight and started doing something about it last week. She's been a real machine: she has to find creative ways to make it up to 1200 calories in a day, usually with a cup of hot cocoa at bedtime. I'm not quite that nuts (men need more calories anyway), but I have cut down a bit. That I'm getting away with high blood pressure and minor cholesterol issues is either really good luck or really good genes. Except for the blood pressure. I'm sure that's genetic.

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9 Responses to Today, I am an old man.

  1. Bill Fox says:

    Its not for everyone but a low carb Atkins style diet can help. I droped my blood pressure 20 points to 128/78 and my colesteral to 169 using low carbs. It beats becomming a marothon runner LOL

  2. My blood pressure dropped 30 points when I got divorced, but I wouldn’t recommend that for you.

  3. Colleen says:

    We should share blood pressures. I’m way low. Every time I go to donate blood I have to convince them that I’m not dead. I average somewhere around 86/62.

  4. Notaturkeybone says:

    Try to get Grave’s disease. You can loose a bunch of weight without doing anything at all.

    Then again, it would also raise your heart rate and blood pressure even more.

    Your head might explode, but you’d be thin when it happened.

  5. Reach Upward says:

    The most important health decision you will ever make is who your parents will be. That’s the largest factor in blood pressure and cholesterol. That’s not saying that we shouldn’t work to improve our health conditions. We should.

    Heck, I have bust my tail with serious workouts six days a week for almost two decades. I eat nutritiously. But none of that overcomes the basic genetic issues. But I’m OK with that. I’m grateful for wonderful parents that gave me life.

  6. Krispy says:

    My dad takes garlic pills. He says that has lowered his.

  7. bestsariah says:

    That’s really high. I have no ideas for lowering it, but now I’m worried. Maybe an energy healing?

  8. Kipluck says:

    Yeah, High Blood Pressure is NOT cool. I had it too, and even though I haven’t lost much weight I have got it down big time by exercising. Mine have been good at every check now. YAY!

  9. Shauna says:

    At least he has a pulse. His stupid blood pressure machine seems to think I’m a dead person. It can’t find my pulse at all.

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